


Sharp Dressed Man

by conceptofzero



Series: Hot Time in the Old Town Tonight [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-09
Updated: 2011-08-09
Packaged: 2017-10-22 10:38:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/237190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptofzero/pseuds/conceptofzero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's loud in the bar, and crowded at the booth table, and the conversation can barely be heard above the noise. That's fine with Stitch though, he's not exactly paying attention to what anyone else is saying. He's more concerned with Droog sitting on his lap, smoking a cigarette and looking like the most bored flapper girl alive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sharp Dressed Man

It's loud in the bar, and crowded at the booth table, and the conversation can barely be heard above the noise. That's fine with Stitch though, he's not exactly paying attention to what anyone else is saying. He's more concerned with Droog sitting on his lap, smoking a cigarette and looking like the most bored flapper girl alive.

Turns out that something Droog enjoys is dressing in women's clothes, when they're tailored to fit him that is, and something Stitch really enjoys is taking a well-dressed 'woman' out on a date. The only person who seems to have figured out that Droog's not a woman is Snowman, but she seems to be keeping her mouth shut, perhaps because it amuses her, or out of some vague sense of politeness.

Droog's still amazingly Droog-like, even when passing for a woman. He's cool, almost chilly, and nothing excites him, no matter how badly Fin tries to impress 'her' (and sitting on Stitch's lap certainly hasn't dulled Fin's constant flirtations). It's been hard to keep his hands off of Droog, or at least in appropriate places. His dress is silky smooth, just as smooth as his legs are, and Stitch's hand rubs back and forth over them, ever tempted to slide up higher and rub Droog's cock.

But they're trying to pass him off as a Divine Dame, not Diamonds Droog, and he keeps his hands near DD's knees. Even those semi-chaste touches are enough to get Stitch semi-hard, though Droog seems to be having better luck keeping his dick in order.

Fin certainly hasn't noticed, leaning in close to speak and yelling over the music, "So what does somebody like you even do for a living?"

"Whatever I want," There's a red band of lipstick around the cigarette, and every time he takes it out of his mouth to speak, Fin's eyes drift over to it. Stitch knows exactly what he's imagining, since it's the same damn thing that's gotten stuck in his own head a dozen times. Though, unlike Fin, Stitch doesn't have to imagine to know what it looks like to have that lipstick on Stitch's cock.

"Yeah, but what do you want to do? Besides look fucking amazing," Fin wrenches his eyes off the cigarette, "'cause somebody like you shouldn't be working for a living."

Droog pointedly ignores Fin's question, stubbing his cigarette out in the ashtray on the table and picking his drink up. It's obvious which one is Droog's, since his is the only glass with red lipstick on it.

Being snubbed still doesn't get the message across to Fin. Stitch isn't quite sure why Fin's chasing Droog so hard, but he's got a few ideas, "You want another drink? I can get you something."

"I need to powder my nose," Droog says, not talking to anyone in particular, and slides out of the booth. Stitch barely bites back a smirk as Droog makes sure to brush up against Fin on his way out, headed to the washroom with the steady snap of heels. He catches a glimpse of Cans standing in the hall before he turns and walks away, Clover running after him. Looks like they're having a spat again.

"You're not going with her?" Trace asks Snowman.

Snowman raises an eyebrow, her cigarette holder dangling from the corner of her mouth, "Why would I do that?"

"Isn't that what women do? Go to the bathroom in packs?" Trace could be making a sexist joke, but Stitch has a feeling he's being sincere. That just makes it even more depressing. Snowman's only retort is to blow smoke in his face.

"Hey," Fin leans over against Stitch's shoulder, "She looks pretty high maintenance. I mean. Divine Dame? Who actually names themselves that, 'sides girls with too big egos."

"She's earned that name, trust me," Stitch keeps his voice low, savouring the moment when Fin's eyes go wide with interest, "Dame's a wildcat in the sack."

"No fucking way," Fin taps his fingers on the table, and Stitch can see the moment he makes up his mind, "Hey, I'm going to the bar. You want something?"

"Scotch on the rocks," Stitch barely finishes saying the words before Fin's up and on his feet, heading away from the bar and towards the women's washroom. He rolls his eyes, but casually watches, waiting to see how this will go down. The crowd on the dance floor makes it a bit tough to see, especially when Sawbuck goes by with some tall carapace in his arms, but he manages to keep an eye on Fin without making it too obvious that he's watching.

Droog comes out a moment later, and stops when Fin starts talking to him. It becomes very obvious what's going on when Fin leans in close, making a rather obvious pass at Droog. Droog plays along, looking cool and unimpressed, but not so unimpressed that he scares Fin off. Instead, he leans in close to Fin and whispers something in his ear.

Whatever it is, it's enough to perk Fin up, and they both glance over at Stitch. Droog curls his finger at Stitch, coaxing him over. He finishes his drink and gets up, heading over to the pair.

Fin looks slightly on edge, but for someone who just tried to steal Stitch's 'girlfriend', he doesn't look nearly guilty enough. Droog waits until Stitch is over, playing it up as he leans up against Stitch, "Fin asked if I'd like to fuck him in the bathroom."

"Oh?" Stitch rests a hand on Droog's ass, fingers stroking it through the silk. There's nothing he wants more right now than to be inside of Droog. Still, he reminds himself, patience, "And what was your answer?"

"That I'd love to suck his cock, but I do need your permission first," Droog runs a finger over the scar on Stitch's face, and when he pouts, it takes everything Stitch has not to laugh.

"Look, I was just-" Fin starts trying to build up his defence, but Droog steps away from Stitch and into his space. Droog's taller than both of them, dark and sleek all over, and he leans in real close to Fin.

"You see the future, right?" Droog sounds sultry, and though it's just a put-on, the voice still goes straight to Stitch's cock. And from the look on Fin's face, it does the same for him, "Can you stop seeing it?"

"I could. Why?" Fin furrows his brow, clearly trying to put it together, but missing the most obvious reason why Droog would ask such a thing.

"If you already know what I'm going to do to both of you, there's not much surprise," Droog's fingers slide down the front of Fin's trousers, rubbing up against his cock. Stitch finds it hard not to laugh at Fin's wide eyes.

When he glances at Stitch, he nods over to the table they both just left, "Dame's worth the surprise. Go on, give it up for the night."

"Holy fuck, okay," Fin agrees, and quickly heads over to Crowbar's table. Droog steps back over to Stitch, pressing against his side. He's hard, but the fabric's hiding it pretty well. Unless you go looking for it, you barely notice the wrinkles in the front.

"You know he'll figure it out eventually," Stitch whispers into Droog's ear, doing his best to play concerned boyfriend. Though it's less concerned at this point and more also-aroused.

"But not until we're done with him." Droog smirks at Stitch, those diamond-sharp eyes glowing with amusement, "He had to chase me over here to tell me that you were a 'faggot'."

Stitch chuckles, watching while Fin gestures and talks to Crowbar, "It's going to be damn good to see the look on his face when he sees your cock."

"I thought you'd like that," Droog leans in and kisses Stitch on the mouth. It's a dirty kiss, Droog's tongue slipping inside of Stitch's mouth the moment it parts. When Droog pulls back, he strokes his thumb along Stitch's mouth, showing him the residue of red, "By the way, cheap lipstick tastes terrible."

Stitch licks his lip, and the bitter waxy taste invades his mouth, "I'll pay you back for this."

"Yes, you certainly will," Droog smiles like a cat that's lapped up the last of the cream. There's a thumping sound, and a chime like a clock going backwards, and when they look over, Fin's rubbing his arm and Crowbar's tucking his crowbar away again, settling back down between Snowman and Trace.

Stitch and Droog quietly duck inside the bathroom after meeting Fin's eyes. Droog lounges against the sink, while Stitch waits by the door. There's a knock and Fin slides in. Stitch makes sure to reach out and click the lock shut, just to buy them some privacy.

Fin's all nerves, but at the same time, stupidly bold. He sees Droog with his back to the sink, looking as bored as he can manage, and he just steps in, hands on either side of Droog's hips. But it's Stitch he talks to, even while eyeing Droog up, "You're okay with this?"

"Won't be the first time she's blown someone else," Stitch answers, noting how Droog's eyes narrow ever so slightly. Truth is, Stitch doesn't know much about Droog's sexual history. Droog's not exactly a sharer when it comes to his past, "Ask her what she wants."

Fin leans in close, "What about it? You want it?"

Droog places a hand in the middle of Fin's chest, pushing him back. Fin takes two steps backwards, away from the sinks, and Droog gets onto his knees without any fuss. Fin glances at Stitch for permission, and after a go-ahead nod, he eagerly steps forward, unbuttoning his pants and getting his cock out, "Alright, open up."

Droog parts his lips, showing just a sliver of tongue. Fin settles one hand on Droog's head, the other wrapping around the base of his cock. He strokes himself a few times before pushing the head against Droog's lips, just rubbing them there. Droog's lipstick smears, thick red lines forming on Fin's foreskin. After a moment of just lingering there, he pushes into Droog's mouth, groaning happily.

"Pretty damn good, isn't she?" Stitch chuckles, catching Droog's eye. Droog keeps that cold non-plused look on his face, sliding his mouth down the shaft, and then ever so slowly back up, leaving red in his wake.

"Fuck, oh fuck," Fin spits out, staring down at Droog, his eyes wide with lust, "You lucky son of a bitch."

"You're damn right," Stitch has been mostly hard all night, and just watching Droog suck off Fin is too much for him to take. He's got to do something about it, and the solution seems pretty obvious. Stitch walks over and kneels behind Droog, sliding his hands over his ass and squeezing them, "Ready?"

Droog makes a muffled sound, and gets his hands on Fin's legs to help hold him upright. His knees skid further apart on the bathroom floor, getting his ass right into position. And even as he's doing this, Droog's still working his mouth up and down Fin's cock, steady long sucks that are getting Fin incredibly worked up.

Stitch carefully gets the oil from his jacket, getting his fingers subtly coated. He pushes Droog's dress up and slips a finger in. Droog's hot and tight, and he groans with relief as Stitch starts thrusting his finger into Droog. Only then does Fin notice what Stitch is doing. Even then, it's clear that he doesn't completely understand that Stitch's fingers are a little high.

"Finger the fuck out of her," Fin encourages Stitch, then reaches out and puts a hand on Droog's head. He gives a push, encouraging Droog to speed up and bob faster, "She looks like she'd like have multiple dicks in her."

Droog mumbles something softly, and Stitch slips a second finger into Droog's entrance, making sure to coat and stretch him out. It doesn't take a lot to get Droog prepped, since he's already halfway there. Stitch hadn't been able to keep his hands to himself when he saw Droog in the finished product, and Droog had been content to let Stitch take care of him for a bit before they went out. Droog pushes back into Stitch's fingers, the greedy bastard clearly dying for Stitch to fuck him.

"Hold on, I'll be there in a sec," He smacks Droog's ass and undoes his trousers, quickly slicking his cock up as well. Fin's eyes are focused on Droog's mouth, and he doesn't notice that Stitch slides into Droog's ass. Even though they've done this plenty of times before, it never stops being fucking amazing when Droog clutches around Stitch, and all that heat just enfolds his cock. It's everything Stitch wants at the moment, and he thrusts forward. Droog moans around Fin's cock, playing up the whorish girlfriend thing.

"These carapace girls really know how to fuck," Fin grins down at Droog, hips shoving into Droog's mouth, "Did you teach her this, or did she come pre-broke."

"Knew everything before she ever blew me under a table," Stitch gets a tight grip on Droog's ass, thrusting steadily into him. The dress rides up high, but not too high. They don't want Fin noticing there's a cock underneath there, not just yet anyway. Stitch just enjoys splitting Droog with someone else, loving the way he pushes back onto Stitch's cock as Fin pushes forward.

"How the fuck do you get all the good sluts? I have to put up with the ones who won't put out," Fin bitches, even while getting blown, a remarkable achievement.

Droog pulls off of Fin, fixing him with an unimpressed look. He keeps a tight grip on Fin's cock, squeezing it hard when Fin tries to shove Droog's face back down, "If you call me a slut, I'll stop. I'm not a whore. I don't appreciate being called one."

"Fuck! Okay, fuck, sorry!" He spits out an apology immediately, clearly only doing so because he's desperate to have Droog go back to sucking on him, "I'll skip the dirty talk!"

"I don't mind the dirty talk. But don't call me a slut," He gives another squeeze for good measure before putting his mouth back over Fin's dick. Fin's hand immediately goes back for Droog's head, trying to force him to speed up again, but Droog shakes it off, setting his own pace. He's not shy though, his mouth messily dragging up and down Fin's shaft, and the sounds he makes are exaggerated but not entirely fake.

"She's a lady, you've got to treat her like one, even when you're doing all sorts of terrible things to her" Stitch replies, speeding his thrusts up and pushing in deeper. He slides one hand down, cupping Droog's reddening ass momentarily, then sliding back up. Fin glances over, and he finally seems to realize where Stitch's cock is.

But he still doesn't get it. He just laughs, "Goddamn, you're fucking her in the ass. She likes that shit?"

"Ask her yourself," Stitch grunts, more focused on Droog at the moment.

"You like that, huh? You a dirty girl?" Fin demands to know. Droog moans, his head bobbing up and down quickly. Soft sucking sounds filling the room as Fin's cock is smeared with lipstick. Even with all the clues right in front of him, Fin is still utterly unaware that he's being sucked off by a man instead of a woman. Stitch is finding it hard to keep from grinning, especially when he's deep in Droog's ass, feeling him tighten ever so perfectly around him, "That's right babe, yeah you like that. Get ready, I've got something for you."

It's a wonder Droog hasn't stopped to chew him out again, or to simply turn around and fix Stitch with a 'can you believe this guy?' look. But there will be time for that later when they're not involved in a menage a trois. He's certain Droog is going to expect payment for doing this, even if he's enjoying it.

Droog works his mouth down further, and Stitch gets a front row seat to seeing Fin just grab hold of Droog's mouth and start face-fucking him. Droog is shockingly tolerable of this, but Stitch suspects it's only because he knows something Fin doesn't. Still, Fin winces and Stitch can guess why. He chuckles, "Watch it, she's got those sharp little teeth."

"Yeah I fucking felt them," Fin thrusts more carefully, but not much more. Stitch times his own thrusts to match Fin's, making sure to trap Droog tightly between them. Droog appreciates it, and he clenches harder around Stitch, moaning softly, "Aw fuck, listen to her. You want this? Huh? You want it babe? Get ready."

He must get ready because Fin's next noise is shocked and dirty, and then his hips lose their steady rhythm. Droog just keeps sucking steadily, and then as Fin stops, he slides his mouth all the way down Fin's shaft, making a nice tight seal. Fin groans and his eyes roll back as he comes. Droog just swallows it all with a few content sounds. Stitch's hips speed up, taken by how fucking hot it is seeing Droog swallow another man's cum, right in front of Stitch.

"That's good," Stitch tells Droog, patting his ass, "That's real good. Why don't you tell him what you thought of that?"

Droog pulls his mouth off, his tongue curving over his lips, and he keeps his voice light and sweet, "Mmm."

"Yeah?" Fin laughs, sagging back, "Fuck, I wish Trace was here. You'd probably suck him off too, wouldn't you? You'd open your mouth for any dick pointed in your direction."

"She only sucks off who I let her," Stitch gets bolder as he gets closer to his own orgasm. He pounds into Droog, savouring the needy noises Droog makes. It's hard to see from this angle, but Droog's got to be hard as a rock by now, and just aching to be touched, "Isn't that right?"

"Yes," Droog moans, clenching wonderfully around Stitch, "Whatever you want."

"You like being fucked in the ass?" Fin rubs a thumb along the red smudged mouth, and Droog starts his tongue out to lick it, "Maybe next time, I'll fuck you good."

"We'll see," He's right at the edge now, ready to lose control the moment he has a chance. Stitch could come inside of Droog, but he's got a better plan. They're putting on a show after all. Stitch pulls out of Droog, giving his ass a slap, "Turn around sweetheart."

Droog does so. He's a mess, lipstick smudged and smeared, cum lingering at the corner of his lips. But he automatically opens his mouth, tongue darting out and daring Stitch to finish this. He'll pay for this later in suits and whatever other things Droog desires, but it'll be worth it. Stitch fists his cock and strokes it quickly, his other hand cupping Droog's head and holding it close.

He grunts as he comes, and commits to memory the way each jet of cum hits Droog's face, leaving little white lines across his mouth and cheeks and nose, "That's it-" Stitch mutters as Droog swallows what fell into his mouth, his tongue swiping along his lips to see what else he can find, "That's good."

"Goddamn," Fin mutters, staring with hunger at Droog, "Where do I find a woman like this?"

Stitch sags back into the wall, pulling his pants back up and buttoning them shut, "Find a woman who'll do anything for a good dress."

"And diamonds," Droog reminds him, still on his knees, his dress riding up and showing off the curve of his ass. The fact that he can still look half-dignified, even when he's a mess, is the thing that Stitch likes best about Droog. Droog's eyes slide up to Stitch's, and then over to Fin, "How about you give me a hand, and we can talk about next time."

"Oh fuck yeah babe, we can work something out," Fin's all too eager to jump at the opportunity. Stitch just leans against the wall, making sure to have a good view. He barely hides the grin on his face as Fin kneels down on the floor and Droog spreads his legs, his dress hanging loose around his crotch. Fin leans in and kisses Droog on the mouth, his hand sliding between Droog's legs.

The very moment he finds what Droog's really packing under that dress may be one of the more satisfying moments of Stitch's life. It's like watching someone touch a live wire. Fin goes skidding back across the floor, and Droog follows him, a smirk playing at the corner of his mouth, "What's wrong?"

"Fuck! Fuck! You're a man! Fuck!" Fin scrambles to his feet, nearly falling when he doesn't quite get a grip. He barrels headfirst into the door, crawling at the lock to get it open. It comes on the third pawing, and then Fin almost trips as the door opens under his weight and swings out. The door falls shut again as soon as Fin's out of the way, and Stitch makes sure to lock it before taking a moment to laugh.

"Stitch," He's interrupted by Droog, and this time Droog isn't faking his voice. His face is a mess and his thighs are still spread wide, "If you don't get down here and deal with this right now, I'll take my knife to the corners of your mouth."

"Hold your fucking horses," Stitch is still chuckling when he comes over to Droog, getting back down on his knees. They crack as he gets down again, and he knows that if it weren't for the few whiskeys he'd drank earlier, he'd be in a hellish amount of pain. But he doesn't feel much of anything, even as he pushes Droog onto his back and shoves the dress up. Droog's so fucking hard and he moans when Stitch wraps a hand around him and starts stroking, "Don't know why he'd want to run away so quickly. He's missing out on the best part."

Normally Droog is so quiet when they do this, but there's just something about the dress that makes him loud, gets all these amazing little moans and whines out of his throat. Droog arches his back, his mouth falling open, and Stitch commits to memory the way Droog looks right now; silk and muscle and a throbbing cock and Stitch's cum on his face, lipstick and mascara smeared.

"You're so fucking beautiful," Stitch tells him, stroking Droog as quickly as he can, eager to hear Droog keep making those desperate little sounds, "I can't get enough of you like this."

"Keep making dresses," Droog gasps out, fists clenching as he writhes on the floor. The dress bunches up around his waist, and Stitch runs his free hand over the silk, listening to the whisper of the fabric as it slips between his fingers, "I'll be like this anytime you want."

He's got to be getting close, judging by the flush on his face. Stitch bows his head, slipping his mouth over the head of Droog's cock and still stroking with his hand. He tastes precum and sweat, and then Droog's breathing goes double-speed and Stitch braces himself.

Droog comes with a grunt, and at the first taste of cum, Stitch slides his mouth straight down Droog's cock, making sure to get all of it. He swallows, closing his eyes and focusing on the cock in his mouth, and the smooth silk against his forehead. Stitch takes his time, making sure to wait until the last bit of liquid floods his mouth before swallowing one last time and raising his head. Droog pants for air, and Stitch can't resist, not when he looks dazed and lethargic. He leans up and kisses Droog, working his way into that lipstick covered mouth.

He's too damn old to be falling in love, just like he's too old to be dating psychopaths, but Droog just has a way of getting Stitch to go against his better instincts. Stitch would be content to stay here like this for the rest of the night, pressed up against Droog, but they can't waste any time. He draws back and Droog slides out from under him, getting on his feet and getting his dress back in order. Droog offers Stitch a hand up and they both head over to the bathroom mirror.

While Stitch wipes lipstick off of his mouth, Droog washes his face and reapplies his make-up, once again disguising his masculine features with eyeshadow and mascara, and fresh vivid lipstick. Stitch makes sure to dust off Droog's back and make sure there's no marks there, and when that's done, he puts an arm around Droog's waist, "You are fucking amazing."

"I know," Droog snaps his lipstick shut and then leans over, pressing a kiss to Stitch's cheek and leaving a mark. It's about as close as Droog ever comes to a you-too.

Stitch unlocks the door and they step out. Fin's waiting right there, and he's up in their faces before either of them can say a thing, "You fuckers."

"What the hell’s your problem?” Stitch immediately puts Fin on the defensive, not giving him a chance to go rambling in his own directions so he can accuse them of deliberately fooling him, “That’s no way to treat a lady.”

"He's a man,” Fin hisses at the both of them, “He's not a lady, he's a man in a dress.”

“Of course she is. That’s why I’m dating her,” When Fin looks like he’s about to burst a blood vessel, Stitch makes sure to get the knife nice and deep into his side, “What the hell are you acting to surprised for? You know I don’t have any interest in women. You told Dame as much.”

“I- what I told her- him!” Fin’s voice rises and quickly falls again, clearly not wanting to draw any attention, “You assholes tricked me. You got me to turn my powers off on purpose.”

Droog slips a cigarette into his mouth and lights it, smoke curling out of his mouth after the first inhale, “Sex isn’t fun if you know exactly what’s going to happen.”

"Don't you even fucking start on that!" Fin snarls, bringing his hand up, and Stitch catches it before the stupid bastard can take a swing at Droog. Droog doesn't even flinch, smoking his cigarette and keeping his cool.

“Nobody tricked you, ‘cept maybe yourself. It ain’t even like I’ve hidden my preferences," He can see Fin's face twist up again, and Stitch just squeezes his arm, forcing him to remember that Stitch still has a pretty good hold on it. "You know damn well what sort of man I am."

"And you know what sort of man I am too," Fin yanks his arm away, his eyes still nervously glancing around to make sure no one is listening in. "You're both fucking assholes."

"You can throw a fit, but you’re the one who spent all night flirting with Dame, more than likely because she was with me," Stitch doesn't bother to keep his voice low, though he doesn't shout it out to everyone either. Fin's attempts to not draw attention are just making it more obvious that something's wrong. Meanwhile, Droog doesn't even blink, just watching with his usual dispassionate stare. "You knew you were getting into."

"I didn't know! I didn't know," Fin rapidly swings back and forth between loud outrage and quiet seething hate, "Fuck you and fuck your crazy freaky bitch and your fucked up games, I'm going to get you for this-"

Stitch leans in, grabbing hold of Fin’s jacket and keeping him held in close. Fin tries to back away, but Stitch has a good grip, and he gets in real close, “No, you aren't. You aren't going to do anything at all."

"Fuck you, are you threatening me? Are you really threatening me?" His eyes flick back and forth between Droog and Stitch, and a bit of uncertainty enters them.

"If I was threatening you, I'd remind you that I have unlimited access to your effigy," Stitch leans in close, speaking in a low tone. "But I'm I'm not threatening. I'm stating a fact. Now, you can run off and tattle to Crowbar, but I’ve got a feeling you’re not going to do that.”

Fin flushes, jaw jutting out even further in frustration, and he sounds sulky when he finally speaks, “No, I’m not.”

“That’s right. And I don’t see any reason to go bragging around about any of this. Dame’s a classy lady, she doesn’t appreciate anybody spreading stories about her,” Stitch doesn’t look at Droog but he can hear him standing just behind Stitch, smoking his cigarette, “So, we write this off as a little experimentation and you can go back to pretending you’re straight as a pin.”

“I am-" Fin barely gets a hold of himself, his hands balled into fists, “Fine.”

Stitch gives Fin’s cheek a pat, but just before he lets go of Fin’s clothes, he leans himself cross that extra few inches and kiss Fin on the mouth. It’s brief and shallow, not much more than him pressing their lips lightly together, but once again he gets that perfect reaction out of Fin, feeling his body go stiff as a board. When he pulls back, his voice is low and throaty, “Next time you want to fuck me, just do it junior. I’m too old for this proxy bullshit.”

Fin just gapes at Stitch as he lets go of Fin and steps back, getting his arm around Droog. Nobody’s noticed or paid it any attention, the music loud as ever and the Felt table busy being rowdy about something else. Stitch and Droog head on back, squishing into the table with the rest. Droog gets settled on Stitch’s lap again, leaning back against Stitch.

The rest of the table goes a bit quiet. Stitch just settles his hands on Droog’s legs, rubbing the sleek carapace and brushing his fingers against the hem of Droog’s dress.

“I’ve got to use the head, ‘scuse me.” Trace makes the least subtle exit that Stitch has ever seen, clearly following Droog and Stitch’s past-trails right back to the bathroom. Fin’s waiting for him there, and he quickly gets in Trace’s way, not letting him anywhere near the bathroom door.

“Those two are fucking weird,” Matchsticks offers, and there’s some general agreement from around the table, even a few snickers.

“Just ignore them until they start breaking something,” Crowbar advises, finishing his drink. He must be pretty toasted because Stitch can see he’s got his other hand on Snowman’s knee. Most surprisingly though, Snowman’s just letting him leave it there, not even blinking an eye at Crowbar’s touch.

While Stitch is puzzling this out, Droog picks up his martini glass, turning around to look at Stitch. He waggles it, "Get me another one."

"You could have asked on the way over," Stitch points out, but Droog just keeps waggling it. He takes it and scoots out of the booth, heading to the bar. A few martinis are a small price to pay to keep Droog happy, and dressed like that.


End file.
